初中英语知识点-书面表达介绍
来源:学大教育 时间:2015-06-10 20:05:38
书面表达是英语学习最基础内容,在英语的学习中同学们必须要掌握到书面表达的写作技巧,取得高分值。下面学大为大家提供的是初中英语知识点-书面表达介绍,希望同学们能够掌握,取得进步。
【写作内容】
姓名: Michael Phelps
出生地: Maryland, USA
出生年: 1985
简历: 5岁开始游泳,从小就热爱游泳;15岁成为入选美国奥运游泳队最年轻的选手;2001年,打破 200米蝶泳世界纪录;2007年3月世锦赛上,勇夺7金,5破世界纪录,被载入史册。
成绩: 多次打破世界纪录,成为当今泳坛最出色的全能型游泳选手之一。
生词:蝶泳 butterfly stroke
【写作要求】
1.必须使用5个句子介绍全部所给的内容;
2.将5个句子组织成连贯的短文。
【评分标准】
句子结构准确,信息内容完整,篇章连贯
■ 写作指导
第一步:认真审题,梳理信息点,构建短文框架
本篇基础写作题要求介绍人物,阅读写作内容,做到四个确定:
1、 体裁与格式:记叙文,普通格式
2、 时态:一般过去时为主,也需使用一般现在时、现在完成时
3、 人称:第三人称(Michael Phelps)
4、 作文的写作要点: 将写作内容中介绍世界泳坛名将迈克尔·菲尔普斯的8个信息条目按时间顺序分为5组信息群:事业发展四阶段,即幼年兴趣、少年入选国家队、两次比赛成绩,最后以世人评价结束此文。
第二步:确定词汇、短语和句型,翻译要点,连词成句
首先用简单句翻译各要点。
1. Michael Phelps was born in Maryland, USA in 1985.
2. He began swimming at the age of five and he likes swimming very much.
3. When he was 15, he became the youngest American Olympic swimmer.
4. In 2001, he broke the world record in the 200-meter butterfly stroke.
5. In March, 2007, he broke five world records and won seven gold medals at the World Championships. He became world-famous.
6. He has broken many world records. He is considered one of the best swimmers in swimming.
第三步:整合句式,使用过渡词连句成篇
以上要点是由8个简单句表达的,必须使用连词写成五句话才能完成写作要求。
Michael Phelps was born in Maryland, USA in 1985 and he began swimming at the age of five and he likes swimming very much. When he was 15, he became the youngest American Olympic swimmer. In 2001, he broke the world record in the 200-meter butterfly stroke. In March, 2007, he broke five world records and won seven gold medals at the World Championships, therefore, he became world-famous. He has broken many world records and is considered one of the best swimmers in swimming.
第四步:复读全文,检查错误
完成写作任务后,考生应复读一遍进行检查,着重复查词汇拼写、使用和语法运用等方面是否存在错误,以及写作内容是否完整,行文是否连贯,逻辑是否合理。
■ 点拨提高
外研版必修五Module 5介绍了我国的体育明星李宁。同学们在教材学习时可以学习到有关体育比赛的表达,积累描述人物的词组和精彩句子,要努力地灵活使用于相关题材的写作中。
以下是润色后的作文(请注意体会划线处的精彩):
Born in Maryland, USA in 1985, Michael Phelps has had a strong passion for swimming since he took it up at the age of five. When he was 15, he became the youngest American Olympic swimmer of all time. In 2001, he broke the world record in the 200-meter butterfly stroke. In March, 2007, he broke five world records and won seven gold medals at the World Championships, both of which have gone down in history. He has broken many world records and is considered one of the most outstanding all-round swimmers in the world swimming circles.
■ 美文共赏
以下出自学生之笔。读者可以看到教材中的好词佳句在写作中恰到好处的运用,体现了“丰富语言输入才能做到语言正确(生动)输出”的英语学习规律。读者需用心品读,并行动起来,积极进行写作素材积累且学以致用,早日写出精彩的英语作文。
1. Michael Phelps, who is the most excellent swimmer in the world, was born in Maryland, USA in 1985. It was just when he was five years old that he began swimming and had a great interest in it. As a consequence, 15-year-old Michael became the youngest athlete of American Olympic Swimming Team. The first time he broke the world record was in 2001,when he participated in 200-meter butterfly stroke. Only when he won seven gold medals and broke five world records in March, 2007 did he become the greatest swimmer in swimming history.
教师点评:读本文可以感受到作者的用心学习,遵循“一句一个高级结构”的提倡,在五句话里,作者依次使用了定语从句、强调句、高级词组、两个定语从句、倒装句,大大增加了短文的可读性。
2. Michael Phelps, who was born in Maryland, USA in 1985, has had a passion for swimming since he started to swim at five. At the age of 15, he became the youngest swimmers in the USA Olympic Swimming Team. Then he broke the world record in the 200-meter butterfly stroke in 2001. What’s more, in March, 2007, he won 7 gold medals and broke 5 world records at the World Championships, which made Olympic history. Nowadays, he has become one of the excellent all-round swimmers in the swimming circle as he broke many world records.
教师点评:本文以时间为线索,用简单明了,但非常准确的语言完成了写作任务。两个定语从句和词组have a passion for, make history, swimming circle及自然的过渡词then, what’s more和nowadays,都体现了作者扎实的英语基础。令阅卷人悦目赏心,得到高分是很自然的。
3. Born in Maryland, USA in 1985, Michael Phelps, who is fascinated by swimming, started his career as a swimmer when he was 5. Ten years later, at the age of 15, Phelps was known as the youngest swimmer that was chosen by the American Olympic Swimming Team. What’s more, he broke the world record in the 200-meter butterfly stroke in 2001, which encouraged him to constantly break world records. At the World Championships held in 2007, Phelps won 7 gold medals and broke 5 world records as well, again making the history. The brilliant athlete is considered to be one of the most excellent all-round swimmers.
教师点评:本文语言表达简洁流畅,第四句里所用的过去分词held作定语,现在分词making作结果状语,可以体现出作者厚实的语法基础。两个形容词fascinated,brilliant和三处副词constantly,again,as well的准确使用,足可见作者的词汇驾驭努力也是相当强的。
4. Michael Phelps, born in Maryland, USA in 1985, has been devoted to swimming since he was a child. He began his swimming career at the age of 5 and soon showed his great talent in swimming and then was selected as a member of the national team when he was 15. As the youngest member of the team in history, Michael distinguished himself by breaking the world record in 200-meter butterfly stroke in 2001. However, this great success was followed by the more splendid achievements that was made at the World Championships in March, 2007. Michael ended his excellent performance with 7 gold medals and 5 new world records, which made him attain his entry in the history records and helped him to prove himself to be one of the best all-round swimmers in the world.
教师点评:本文以丰富的词组表达见长,七个划线的词组准确、生动,足见作者注重积累词组,英语语言功底扎实;此文已具备了考场满分作文的条件。
在英语书面表达的写作中同学们也需要掌握到写作的技巧,上文学大为大家提供的是初中英语知识点-书面表达介绍,希望大家了解。
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